In Which I Parody Shakespeare (Badly.)

This has been hanging around in the notes section of my iPod for weeks now, and I thought I should put it to good use. I'm not The Bard, just a British teenager with a love of writing and a procrastination habit. As my GCSEs draw ever nearer, the revision process is starting. But it's difficult and I was bored so I wrote this. Note: I don't own Hamlet. I just own four Shakespeare-themed coffee mugs and copies of a few of his plays.

To revise, or not to revise: that is the question:

Whether 'tis better for my grades to procrastinate

With Twitter and fanfiction,

Or to take arms against the sea of procrastination,

And by revising, end it. To tweet; to sleep;

No more; and by prom we can see the end of

The heart-ache, and the sheer, undeniable terror

During the wait to results day

Before we go to Reading. At last we sleep;

We sleep: we dream of summer

For in that extended summer what dreams may come,

When we have finished our GCSEs

And can finally pause: we'll burn our books

And forget what an alpha particle is;

For until September, the world is ours

Three months of freedom, three months of sun,

We forget stomata, the water cycle,

The electromagnetic spectrum,

We forget who Gorbachev was,

The Cold War was a boring topic anyway

What even is caesura? What's enjambement?

We don't need to know now, anyway 

Because the poetry anthology's gone

CGP guides are a thing of the distant past 

Our exams will be stressful,

We'll cry together on Skype,

And wonder why we took textiles,

Media does make cowards of us all,

And thus the days of chemistry revision

Is made worse with the uncompleted textbook,

Because you spent two years on Core Science

But we have just a few months

To prepare for action.